Excitedly Optimistic

Despite the doom and gloom of yet another rainy day, some moderate stress-induced chest discomfort, and a seemingly endless time crunch, I had an epiphany today. It struck me as I listened to Leona Lewis’ song “Bleeding Love” for the fifth time today. Whenever I flipped on a radio at work, jumped in the car, or even trucked along on the treadmill at the gym, Leona followed me. It dawned on me that, underneath it all, I’m thrilled about this transition.

Throughout the apartment-hunting fiasco and ongoing chats with Resources of the Human variety, I still felt a hesitance, one mixed with fear of the unknown. Leona’s repetitive performances reminded me that I’ll soon depart all the repetition and routine in my life. It’s so exciting! The pendulum finally moved from its precarious position exactly half-way between “scared out of my wits” and “hurray for this awesome experience” and is now resting at “excitedly optimistic.”

I spoke with my leasing consultant today, and she’s going to “guard” my first-choice residence for me. It’s the townhouse with cathedral ceilings, a whirlpool tub, and new appliances. I’ll admit, it’s way more than I need. In my defense, those features are standard in the market; what’s an undeniable bath-lover to do? I briefly tossed around the idea of living in my car, in the hospital’s parking garage. I could just see it…I’m standing in my PJ’s, brushing my teeth, waving to the CEO as he passes by on his way into the office.

Some of my excitement came from my acceptance of this townhouse. I felt like I didn’t deserve it and that it was wasteful. But my wise friend, Yoshi, instructed me to approach this property as if it’s a vacation home, as a safe, secure respite from the mind-numbing stress. You never *need* a vacation home, but you do need a safe, relaxing place to bathe!