Lent. The fabulous, penitential season of repentance. With a dash of self-loathing.
Every time my cousin and I feel we need a "re-centering" or "time of denial," we start a lent. Yes, it's arbitrary to us but it signals something larger...a time to deny self, a time to focus on our inward sinful tendencies, a clean slate to start over once again. My cousin and I are on lent, version 36.4.25 from the last several years. But each fresh start helps us attend to little decisions throughout the day that lead us to a certain place (or away from a certain place). It's a great opportunity to click the "reset" button on the ol' stopwatch to 0.00. But it's also a chance to focus on others for once. Others' pain, others' poverty, others' misfortune.
That's what Pope Francis says for (the official) Lent this year...instead of all our usual self-loathing about how flawed we are internally, let's focus on the exterior things we can do to improve one person's life. Maybe many peoples' lives. But one person's life for sure. Yes, it's important to work on our selfishness, habits that might lead us away from God, or fasting to feel a sense of sacrifice (which, if we admit, is pretty darn rare in our first world lives). Humans aren't wired to enjoy struggle. It's against our evolutionary roots, to knowingly allow that hunger in the pit of our bellies, running an extra half mile on the treadmill at the end of your workout, picking lettuce when there's a tator tot bar around the corner. We don't enjoy sacrifice and tend to fear its discomfort.
To me, Lent is my annual opportunity to familiarize myself with discomfort.
Traditionally, I'm not very good at maintaining my Lenten commitment. I have never signed off Facebook at midnight on Fat Tuesday, with an Edward R Murrow-esque goodbye. I can't even remember what I attempted to give up last year. But one year, maybe 2008, I was faithful to my commitment to have no sugar. Dietary resolutions seem elementary, like you're showing God how much you love Him by saying no to the Oreos, coffee creamer, and candy. But when you've had a really bad day, sometimes culinary comfort is in order (see? That's where I am with sacrifice...I've had a ridiculous, 12-hour day, and I feel I DESERVE my coffee creamer. Dammit, I survived the day. Now hand over that candy corn and no one will get hurt). Anyway, my point that, on Easter, I ate a Cadbury Egg and about died from the sugar (as the roots of my tooth disintegrated). But it was because I re-calibrated. Eating healthy and taking care of this body that is the temple of the Holy Spirit? I'm not so quick to judge people who successfully give up chocolate for Lent. I get it now.
This year, Jack and I have a few shared sacrifices in mind. I have a couple of doozies in mind for my own journey. Our pastor this past weekend successfully wove a homily together from both the fisherman gospel and the Super Bowl....in essence, "Go Deep." Don't stay in the shallows but challenge yourself and trust God while you're at it. Throw yourself out there and see what happens.
So we're going deep.
I think we're all being challenged to look beyond ourselves and see what we can do for the less fortunate. That's making me look beyond my own sugar consumption this year.
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