Friday Funny

Officer Corn and I have become pretty good friends these last few months. He's a former police chief and tells harrowing stories about his life on the Force. He made his security guards (Jay and Silent Bob) promise to walk Nurse Jackie and me to our cars in the evenings. He has a witty streak and laughed for about five minutes when he found out one of the security guards ticketed my car.

Yes, I was ticketed on Monday. My assistant quickly called Security and demanded I receive a Gold Star. First, I had no problem calling Security, but she took care of this before I could even act on it. Then I was approved to receive a "gold star," which is simply a gold parking sticker. It's basically the sacrosanct license to park anywhere on hospital grounds (except maybe in the ambulance bays). Only top hospital execs and physicians receive the Gold Star, so I felt pretty special to receive one of these stickers.

I think it's because I'm friends with Officer Corn.

So anyway, my assistant repealed my ticket and the security guard who ticketed me actually stopped by my office to apologize! I told him I was glad he ticketed me, because it shows that security is cracking down and holding people accountable. I just didn't *know* about the cracking down!

Officer Corn has been giving me an extremely hard time about this all week. That, and the fact that I hit a barricade in the parking lot; one protecting Facilities' work on cement columns. Everyone keeps chiding me about hitting the barricade and getting ticketed. I haven't told them about the kid I (accidentally) hit a few years ago!

I got my revenge, though. Officer Corn wrote a policy and memo to hospital staff to remind them that Security's "cracking down" on hospital parking. Nurse Jackie asked me to revise the policy because it sounded like a cop wrote it and it was too harsh and gruff. I re-wrote the policy, phrasing it more positively, and printed it out. Borrowing one of the secretaries' lint rollers, I left the softened policy and lint roller in Officer Corn's office with a note saying, "DeFuzzed!"